Win, Lose & Sing the Blues

Sometimes I embrace my inner cynic.  Other times I think: "I'm never gonna change.  No one ever changes."

I didn't work out as much as I should have this week, but I did go to my group run on Saturday.  I fell to the back of the pack within the first 10 minutes of our 2-mile run/walk.

Fabulous.

First it was pony tails and tight tushies.  Then came the MILFs.  Then the GILFs.  Then some not-so MILFs and GILFs.

Then there was just me. And a lady recovering from surgery.  And a trainer who apparently drew the short (chubby) straw.

As they passed me I kept thinking about how stupid I was for not training harder. I thought of all the wasted opportunties.  I thought about how I was going to do better next week.  I wondered if my heart was going to explode. I wondered if the trainers were certified in CPR. I wondered which breakfast sandwich was on sale at Hardee's.

I tried to be positive.  I imagined it was the sight of my ass and thighs rubbing together and violently rippling beneath 'breathable' polyester that really helped motivate those people to run faster than me.  Maybe they just couldn't bear to look.  Maybe they were afraid the ground would crack beneath my footfalls and they didn't want to turn an ankle or see the Earth's core. 

I dunno..I just love being an inspiration. So, I tried to focus on that.

Then things took an unexpected turn. 

About halfway through the run I noticed the same rear ends that once breezed by me were now in my way!

It wasn't that I was running any faster ~ they were running slower.

Now, I'm not sure if they were running out of gas because they were pushing themselves too hard too fast or if, since passing me, they had lost the adreniline rush of watching my 'before-esqe' booty shuffle and lurch.

Then, guess what.

I finished with the front of my group.

Can you believe that shit?

I hope that it won't go to my head, tho.  I expect next week I'll show up feeling all superior about my ability to conserve my energy and my savvy running strategy only to be lapped by the 'walk only' group.

I look at it this way.. the universe tossed me a bone this week...

And I plan to suck out and savor every single ounce of marrow that I possibly can. 

"Some will win, some will lose.  Some were born to sing the blues." - Journey